Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Ho hum

Life has been busy.  Jer went to work for two weeks WAYYY up North, then came home for 6 days and is currently on his 6th day away out of 16.  Life without him sucks.  Period.  When he came home for those 6 days we crammed everything in and were on the go non-stop.  When he gets home on the 27th he'll be hom until the 10th and then be gone again.  In the middle of that is our annual Thanksgiving trip to Havelock and I'm very much looking forward to the time away with our family.

I've been feeling very lost.  Since I am now retired as a surrogate mother, I'm realizing that being a child bearer defined me.  No matter what I was doing, there was pregnancy in the future.  It affected decisions I made (like whether or not to commit to activities or not because I might be pregnant and have to back out).  I planned life around it.  Now that I'm finished using my uterus so to speak, I'm trying to figure out where I fit.  Of course, I'm a wife and mother, first and foremost and always have been/will be.  But now, I have to figure out where I fit in for myself.

I joined our local Operatic Society again this year and will be performing with them in the show "Oliver!" in February and March.  I've done it before and I loved it and am very much looking forward to it again.

I'm also going to be making some beaded jewelry with my sister in law.

I have my mother in law bringing me some smooth stones from her beach front cottage today that I plan to paint as well.

I have a few things on the go and am trying to find my non-preggo groove.

It's hard without my husband, my support, my rock, to guide me and give me advice in person...communication is much different over texts and skype.

I'm definitely managing.  I've started FLYing and am loving it.  It's a really great feeling to have things organized and in order all the time.  I was doing pretty good on my own but it's nice to have something to "follow" everyday.

So life is very up in the air, very "wait and see"....we're hoping there is a job at home soon but realistically he could be going back and forth from home to WAYYY up North until Christmas....I'm crossing my fingers that it will end sooner than that.  However, if it doesn't, we do have Havelock (Fri-Mon) and then Florida (Sunday to following Monday) to look forward to.  Then in November we have James' birthday (which we're planning a big paintball party for him and his friends, he's stoked!) and then of course Christmas in December.  I'll have quite a bit of planning to do on my own if he has to travel all that time...I don't mind really, it keeps me busy and makes the time pass quicker.

Hope everyone is well!  We're hanging in there.....